Strange Day...

WOW...the day is not over, but it has been one strange day. Let me start off by saying, I thought I was pregnant...why, well for the past 2 weeks I was having pregnancy symptoms, and this past weekend, they became more noticeable to me (won't go into detail). Well, I guess what I thought were pregnancy symptoms are new menstrual symptoms, that was the start of it. Then I get a phone call from my husband, and he confessed to something, I was mad, at first, then I couldn't be because he confessed, and then he told me some good news about work. The strangest thing...I have a facebook, who doesn't, and I received a new friend request...from the EX - WTH? It's a long story with him, I am not going into detail about it here, but I laughed when I saw it, I didn't accept or deny, I just sent him a message asking him to email me, we shall see if he does or not. I want to know what his intentions are, I mean I haven't seen him in 15 1/2 years. He did send me a message on FB back in March asking about THE KIDS (love it, he said the kids, not my kids, your kids, or their names, just the kids), well I replied, etc. I mean does he honestly think I'm going to say yes???? He had control of me back then, but 15 years later, I've grown up a little, I have zero feelings for him, so its not like I'm going to just let him back in my life at the drop of a hat. My kids are not his anymore, he gave them up, so he has to wait a few more years until they are 18 to see them, if they want to at that point. He sent the request at 11am, I sent him the message at 1145am, so its just a waiting game now, but I'm not going to sit at my computer and wait...he has NO control over me anymore, how can he?



Ok...later!


♥.☺.♫

Friends

You knew it was coming...if you read the previous post.

I've had issues with some people in my life who I thought were my friends, now they are just people in my life. See some of the people did me wrong in one way or another, rather it had been very hurtful or not even worth thinking about, it was still a wrongdoing. One day, back in August, I forgave EVERYONE who ever hurt me and I emailed tons of people a little note stating my new outlook on life.

It goes back to this post. I received some replies, and of course the people who I knew wouldn't reply, didn't. Some responses I received (shortened and no names)...

Loves me and happy about new outlook
Told me how they use to judge people and when something happened to them, they stopped
Has always seen me as a great person
A few I love yous
A few proud of mes
Enjoys our friendship
Said I need a back deck night - hasn't happened...
A few supporters
Funny one - thought I was suicidal/depressed, not funny, funny, but funny (suicide is NOT funny)
Strong person
One person stated they wanted to start anew and forget all the ugly in the past, but funny how the last time I saw this person, they acted like I had the plague...whatever

So...I kind of know where I stand with some people in my life, but I can honestly say I can count on my 1 hand who I can 100% count on...and that is not a bad thing.

Another thing that I've learned - don't put yourself in the middle of drama - that is easy. Most of the drama revolves around teenagers - leave it with them...how are is that? I walk away from crap, if people talk to me about things I don't want to know about, I tell them to stop or I just pretend to listen (great my secret is out, ha)

Anyway, I have a busy evening ahead, so I'll post again soon.


♥.☺.♫

09.24.09

NERD

Okay so call me a nerd…I was sitting at J’s school yesterday afternoon (5pm) thinking about this blog…told you – NERD! I was just jotting things down about what I could blog about – since I lead such a blah, bland and boring life, since DRAMA is gone (at least for now, but when drama does hit – I post to my private blog).

So, here is a list of things I may blog about, or not:

Kids – always – they are the coolest people in my life right now. They have dreams and goals that I would love to share!

Husband – well…not sure how often I will speak about him since all he does is wok, bowl, work, cook, work, laundry, work, did I mention work. He is a great man, husband and father.

Friends – some are cool, heroes, strange, supportive, have kids who I’d call as mine own, at times. I have some who may think they are my friends, but they are just in my life, is that mean? I mean recently I've forgiven all the people in my life...another blog...hmmmm...

Politics – uh…doubt it – why – well my views are just that…MINE! I don’t like it when people push their views on me, so why would I do it to you? I may, I said may, voice my opinion on a few things – but nothing major. The year there is not a big election – well sort of – Sheriff for the city I live in, which just so happens to be my hubby’s boss – HA – so – VOTE MCCABE!


Music – love all kids of music…it’s soothing.

Randoms – well of course, random things happen during the day, maybe.

If there are other things you’d like to see posted – lemme have it!

♥.☺.♫

09.23.09

I haven't posted to my other blog, which is private, in awhile, which is a good thing, that means...DRAMA

I don't mind this one being open, cause if you really wanna know...ask either via post or email me it's that easy, but I'm not sure who all reads this stuff, but I enjoy writing about things.

I have started my fotos.by.steff hobby. If you wanna see, check out fotos.by.steff - I'm having fun. I've only took some of my kids recently, but I think they are good...here is my fav:

I am going to print it out and hang it on my wall - LOVE IT!

I have another blog (i know...WTH...how can I manage 4, 3 blogs), it's not too bad. Like I previous stated, I have one that is private, but the last time I updated that was 08.05.09...I have this one, my fotos one, and then there is the I AM...I CAN...I WILL one. That one, right now, is private, until I feel up to opening it up. It's about my weight, my being unhealthy, etc. I need to become healthy, but anywhoooooooooooooooooooooo...

I had a wonderful conversation with a real close friend last night about my kids. It was fun talking to her about them, because a few hours earlier I was at open house, I know...why do I go to a HS open house...All of R's teachers adore him...they love his personality, yes he has a great one, but it can also be dangerous. He reminds me alot of SD (sperm donar), which I don't care for, but they are the good reminders, not the bad ones. He doesn't have his bad attributes, thank goodness...I'd have to ship him off, so kidding, maybe. Anyway, L and I were talking about J & R, and a few of their friends, and how I adore them (some), and would do anything for them. We came to the conclusin that R is...well a clown, but can be serious at times, lazy, cause he's smart as a whip, but doesn't use his brain much, ha! He has a heart of gold as well. J, well she's finally learning to cut the cord (YAY FOR ME!) She's very sensative and doesn't deal with bad things very well. Just recently a good friend of J's father passed away and J became close with this family and I told her and boy oh boy. I didn't want to tell her, but I had to and it was hard for me to see her cry like that, but she is a strong girl, she will be fine!

Jealous much - well J is going to NYC for spring break 2010...She's going to see 2 of these 3 shows; Lion King, Wicked (we saw this here, but different on broadway), or Shrek, The Musical. She will attend a cast patey with the cast of one of the 2 shows, and will have dinner with them. She will take a guided tour of Lincoln Center and Rockefeller Center. She will also visit Chinatown, Times Square, Central Park and Battery Park...MOM WANTS TO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It will cost me 400$ to chaperone, so I think I will pay the 500$ and let J have the time of her life in NYC!

Enough posting for now...I am going to the middle of nowhere this weekend, so I will post when I return, unless something exciting happens between now and then (doubt it).

♥.☺.♫

09.22.09

Wow…September is almost over…Imma slacker – ha!

Been busy with work, kids back in school, J’s softball, R’s ROTC, not feeling the greatest lately – but that’s come to an end – I hope.

I’ve been thinking about stuff that I need to get done around my house – ready for the list…

YARD – I need to learn to love doing yard work – I hate it…I want my yard to look like everyone else’s in my neighborhood. Flowers, bushes, pretty edge, etc. I need to call B and have her help me get started on it.

LIVING ROOM – I need to get rid of the entertainment center. N said she wanted it, but we can’t come up with a way to get it, ha! I just sent her a text, so I hope something soon. D and I got a 56inch TV and the entertainment center is in the way, once that is gone, we can paint the rest of the wall and put the TV where it needs to go. Then I have to figure out where to put all my pictures…great!

J’S ROOM – She’s 16, not 6, so we need to paint it so it looks like a 16 year old lives in that room, not a 6 year old. She wants blue and one part of her wall she wants chalk board paint – neat idea.

R’S ROOM – Well his walls are just white, so he wants to do something funky to his walls, it fits!

BATHROOM – I DISLIKE IT! Need to fix plumbing and get a new bathtub. The plumbing leaks into the wall that is in Dining Room

DINING ROOM – fix the wall.

OTHER – want to finish taking up carpet and finish the hardwood floors underneath. I know we need to fix the floor near the back door. I want siding on the house, also repair my deck. Need to fix molding around front and back door.

House is a work in progress.

It will get done, slowly, but it will get done.

I guess I’ll return to what I was doing…WORK!

09.01.09

September – YAY! It actually feels like it outside too. It's nice and cool outside, feels wonderful. Look - LOVE THIS...

New month, new me, & new outlook (same outlook as before, but more now than before). I don't want the I don't give a F*** attitude, but I just want to leave the drama to the ones who cause it, know what I mean.

Last night took the kids school shopping and I managed to stay alive and so did they, amazingly. They so want to go back to school, so do I…not that they bother me, but I just want to know that they are doing something constructive.

I think the main reason I want school to start is so that the DRAMA can stop, not saying it won't, but it'll be new drama – ha!!!! But last year wasn't bad, and they'll be so busy with school work and sports and other activities that drama will be no where in sight – we hope.

Well let me get some work done now…ha!

xoxo